可里可里可里~巴巴变~

只不过是火车上的偶遇
变成今天演唱会的邀请
罗大佑
李宗盛
齐豫
赵传
个个是诱惑
可萍水相逢
为什么要弄得这么隆重
我躲躲躲躲
躲不到真心挂念的那个人身边
乌龟背壳又紧紧背上
我不会出去
也请你不要进来

饭菜都做好了，为什么左等右等，爸还是不回来？[face08]

早看一遍，晚看一遍，为什么等来等去，就是等不到他的包裹？[face08]

清晨上班的路上，碰到公司的司机李师傅，从小口的那个公车站向公司走去。从车站到公司很是有一段距离，平日里总是他开车带我去这里那里，今天暂且也让我充当一次他的自行车夫好了。我放慢速度和他打招呼，满面笑容热情招呼他坐到我的自行车后面。他望着我放在车座上硕大的书包，怔了两秒。缓过神来后，一迭连声道：“不用麻烦了不用麻烦了，你快走吧快走吧。”我一直坚信过分的坚持有时会给人带来某种程度的不适，就踩上脚踏板准备开路。李师傅在我身后补充了一句：“慢点走啊。”一时间我有片刻的迷惘，不知道自己到底应该快走还是慢走。

到了办公室，YY告诉我BB刚刚来过，放了一个东西在我的抽屉里。一个存了25首歌的mp3，首首唱到我的心里去。相识这么久，我预想的将来还是让人无奈的辜负与被辜负。我很清楚他的意思，但我是一个有时候拐到死角也不肯转圜的人，而我又真的不愿意看到谁的热情白白抛入海中得不到回应。BB，真的对不起，只有你去换个方向，我们这么长久的友情才有活路。

马上要将资料的剩下部分移交给运行部，我埋在几百年没擦的资料柜埋头苦找，黑漆漆的手指证明了时间同样能带来无尽的灰尘。堆积如山的材料从来没有人看，只不过老总一时兴起的号召，大家便像模像样的忙碌起来。到头来，还不又是扔破布似的抛在一边。只是提醒自己要将桌上已被我用袖子长时间擦拭过的几本干净的保护好。

下午的时候YY神色诡异的让我到楼下人力资源去领RMB，好生奇怪，莫非我又做了什么特殊贡献让领导觉得非要有所表示不成？等我到了人力资源，呜呼，做贡献的人排成长龙阵啦~还是娘子军，阴胜阳衰的趋势还在进一步扩大不成~只见发钱的BB同志有条不紊的数钱发钱让人签字，临走不忘说一句“三八节快乐啊”。原来如彼~

领了四个人的三八红包回到办公室分发，招来在场男同志的一阵嘘唏。这个世界就是不平等滴，凭啥户口本第一页都是你们内？（我家的户口本第一页是我亲爱的奶奶大人，哈哈）

拿了一件chicco的婴儿装和两个围嘴给晓丽的宝宝，换来她好几声的惊呼。当了妈妈的人一提到或见到任何与宝宝有关的事物，都或多或少神经质般的不能自控。

下班的时候被通知明天下午放假半天，妙极~

家里还有周六剩下的饭，决定打扫干净再做新的。做了鱼丸香菜白菜汤哄哄我爸和自己，只可惜上次吃火锅剩下的调料不太多，有点清淡了。将饭菜端到桌上，去给鸟宝宝们弄吃的，拿回来的路上心思又莫名其妙的飞到了爪哇国，结果把鸟食端到了爸面前，引得他一阵好笑。人鸟同食嘛，有什么稀奇。

锅里还剩一点儿汤，明天早上放点白菜，把小新从东北带来的金丝面下了，早饭也有了。 [face17]

哇呀呀，一锅金丝面烩白菜煮成了浆糊 [face25][face03][face11]。现在才知道应该按朝鲜冷面的那个做法，把面条煮好了再和汤过一下就行。好在爸和我都不是挑剔的人，山珍也好，糊糊也罢，进了肚子，通通一个样，嘿嘿。肚子充实了，上班去也~

凌晨三点。电脑键盘还在劈里啪啦作响。决定周日去通县张林海那里是临时的，我以为爸工作那么忙这周没可能了。压了一周的稿在昨天晚上十一点时才只完成了第一段。恼人的~艺术类的翻译让我咬文嚼字到脑浆发疼。可里可里可里，巴巴变变变！！！念了这许久，纸上还是这寥寥数字，译出来的文字也乏味的可以，再变也变不出花来。早上七点半的火车，索性今晚就不睡了。听歌，当爱已成往事，你的眼睛，练习，最浪漫的事……爸刚揉着惺忪睡眼问我这么晚了在搞什么名堂，还不是……老毛病，一如上学的时候，不到不得以不会起来磨枪~我的枪呐，巴巴光光光。

还有三段。。。加油啦！

……

3:33am...还有两段~

4:05am...还有最后一段了^^

4:24am...完成^^^^

4:34am...检查并修改完毕。。。

……

终于，可以睡觉了…… [face15]

[face04][face09][face18]

可里可里可里，巴巴睡 [face26]

我回来啦~荒废很久的家~[face33]

[face38]终于把[face27]唤醒了……[face19]

我回来了。[face27]

ps：￥#—*（真烦人，刚刚提交竟然说日志内容太少。。。

困得一合眼便睡着了。梦境从来都是绵延不绝，如果现实中的分分合合，一睁眼也能如梦散过不留痕迹，我还会不会在36度的高温下任泪腺与汗腺争夺一天下来所剩无几的水分？

去年如斯。今年如斯。不管是过去的火车站的大规模挥泪送别，还是刚刚经历的竭力平淡的电话道别，更换的只是形式和对象而已，不曾改变的永远是牵肠挂肚。不管多近多远，不管用哪一种语言，再见总是说得无比艰难。不曾远游的人，会通过臆想无限扩大原本也许并不很远的距离。

我们的距离，有没有一光年？如果没有，那为什么飞来飞去，你总不能飞来停留在我身边？

Same time next year，再相遇时地球会不会又绕太阳转了再一圈？她们说一生中哪怕有温暖的仅仅1秒也是值得的，因为留下足够的日子去回忆。而我没有把握的是温暖会不会也有保质期。。。

也许担心没有必要。这个炎热的夏天，温暖是多余的。

2004.7.5

水墨画般的云彩挂满天的时候，我站在风口吃完第二根冰棍。傍晚的风赶走肆虐一天的酷热，满身满脸的汗凝结在身上，舔舔嘴角似乎还是咸的。

最近实在是邋遢的要命——沾满灰尘的眼镜歪七歪八挂在T恤上；皮筋松松垮垮的系在凝成结的头发上；滴上石灰水、水泥汤和冰棍汁的裤子因为蹲得过久而皱皱巴巴；满鞋面的灰土和鞋帮的泥看起来像刚从田里回来……从家里开始装修，除了去北京的那十几天，我天天天天和妈一起当“监工”，朝九晚五，午饭常常2、3点才吃。过阵回姥姥家，一定会被当成从非洲回来。。。[face14]

New York City

Episode 1: In a small disordered room. Siao Yu and Giang Wei had dinner together. Giang Wei seemed tired and kept yawning. The smell of fish distributed from his clothes. Siao Yu’s arms ached for she had made clothes in a factory for a whole day. She did not tell Giang Wei. Giang Wei talked about the things they would do when they got identities. Siao Yu just hoped the life full of hiding from immigration officers would pass soon.

Episode 2: In the church. Siao Yu dressed in typical Chinese red, followed by Mario, then Giang Wei. She “revolved in” the church through a revolving door. When she revolved out she became the wife of Mario’s, who was a 67-year-old Italian. Siao Yu and Mario were both perplexed when they were having a picture taken with each other. Giang Wei turned his back on.

Episode 3: At Giang Wei’s apartment. Giang Wei had not came back. Siao Yu wrote a letter to Giang Wei’s mother, telling her everything was good with them. When Giang Wei was back, they had dinner together. They both said little. Next morning, Giang Wei kissed Siao Yu before he got up for work, then he looked up at the ceiling and said there were still 364 days.

Episode 4: In Mario’s house. Siao Yu had to move to Mario’s and lived with him, in order to prevent immigration officers’ sudden inspection. Mario’s house was in a mess. Siao Yu had to walk carefully. She was learning English in the evening in her room. Harsh music interrupted her. Mario was drunk again. Siao Yu turned on her radio as well and turned up the volumn to the highest. Italian music and Chinese song mixed. She turned it off until it was quiet in the other room. A cunning smile appeared on her young face.

Episode 5: In the laundry. Siao Yu was reading a book with a small dictionary. She found it in a corner of her room and surprisingly found it was written by Mario. She only raised her head when a man greeted her. He introduced himself as Mario’s friend. Siao Yu just smiled, not knowing what to say. The friend said his money was not enough for the laundry. Siao Yu gave him almost all the money in her wallet.

Episode 6: In Mario’s house. Siao Yu put things in order for Mario. Mario was furious when he came back and found everything changed its position. He cried when he was messing things up again. Siao Yu went out without saying a word.

Episode 7: At Giang Wei’s apartment. Giang Wei warned Siao Yu if Mario did anything bad to her, she must tell him. She said nothing. Giang Wei was a little upset. They had less and less to talk about.

Episode 8: In Mario’s house. Mario’s ex-wife Rita came back home from vagrant life. She was angry that Mario married Siao Yu. But she could not help being interested in Siao Yu for she was totally different from her. She sometimes was jealous also. She shouted and quarreled with Mario. Siao Yu stayed in her own room, not sure if she was part of the reason that they quarreled.

Episode 9: At Giang Wei’s apartment. Siao Yu was cooking and waiting for Giang Wei. She read the letter from Giang Wei’s mother. It said she wants Siao Yu to look after Giang Wei and fasten his heart. Giang Wei still did not come. Siao Yu went back to Mario’s house. It was dark in the corridor, while Siao Yu was already used to groping her way in the dark. The light was on suddenly. It was Mario who turned on the light. After a while Siao Yu heard the sound of quarreling.

Episode 10: In Mario’s house. Rita left again. Mario told Siao Yu it was not her fault and Rita would come back soon. Siao Yu bought a newspaper for him when she was back from work. She found Mario picked his pen up and began to write again.

Episode 11: In Mario’s house. Rita came back. Immigrantion officers came, too. Rita helped Siao Yu and Mario to cope with them. After the officers had gone, she packed her things and went away. Mario said nothing and just kept drinking.

Episode 12: At Rita’s apartment. Siao Yu was persuading her to go back

老天一定是认为我太灰心，觉得有必要鼓励一下，于是今天，我又温习了……一~见~钟~情~

是和一只扎朝天辫的长毛小白狗。

像所有经典的电影画面，它从路的那边，我从路的这边，相对走着。相遇的那一瞬四目相接，我有我的矜持，继续走着，尽管它再可爱不过；它却停下脚步，不叫不闹，只深深深深的看着我。我回头，它凝视，我再回头，它再凝视。那双专注的乌黑的眼睛想要传达的情感，仿佛已经超出了一只陌生狗与一个陌生人的交流范畴。

是真实的一切。不是它是人，就是我是狗；我们被彼此的目光吸引。

唯一的缺憾是那个可恶的电灯泡，它的主人；死命的拉着绳子，好象我是掠夺者。

我只是想，在脑海中记下几十秒的那一刹。有一只小狗，曾经那样凝视过我；我的世界，便不再是原来的那一个。

一起在韩国烧烤店吃晚饭，在气温三十八度的炙热黄昏，回去路上误把一个普通的寺院认作天坛；

一起上街买东西，在两家商店买了八件汗衫，在sparetime买了一个羽毛球拍；

一起在街角不知名的小店吃炒面，喝啤酒；

一起睡去，一起醒来，一起洗澡，一起吃早餐，一起看球赛；

喜欢牵着手在有微风的夜晚散步，时间仿佛挥霍不完，路也没有尽头；

喜欢互相抱着沉沉入睡，整夜的黑暗一转眼便在窗帘外逃遁；

喜欢深深的相互凝视，一生的目光都想在此刻定格；

喜欢黑夜，喜欢清晨，喜欢欢笑，喜欢眼泪，喜欢在一起。

……

第十天是灰姑娘的午夜十二点，所有的甜蜜瞬间成过去。

然后是长久的等待。

不能用时间，只能用心衡量的……等待。

Maomao’s mother arranged a match maker for her, which she hates so much. She told me it was like trading draught animals.

Maomao said, reality is reality. There will be a day when we have to sink in the good or bad vulgar. There will be a day, when we will be tied by a piece of paper, unwillingly.

But I still believe, one day, we will like to be tied by something, when we finally find the pearl that we have been looking for for thousands of days and times. What will tie us is not the paper, but the person and our hearts.

There will be a day, when we will feel like being tied, very willingly.

Our new apartment is being decorated. Jian is one of the carpenters doing the woodwork. His father is the leader of the group, which consists of his relatives only. Jian is the youngest. He is only 17.

Jian’s face is often covered with dust. But the dust cannot cover his smile with shyness. He is usually quiet but often whistles when he is working, as if the heavy work was nothing but joy.

I asked him to make a nest for my birds one day. This way I got to talk to him a little bit. He told me he came from Hubei. Since his family can’t afford his education, he had to drop out of school and work full time.

I asked if he felt regretful. He said lots of friends of his discontinued their studies in junior high school because of financial problem. This is fate. Nothing to complain.

When he talked about it, I saw only calmness in his eyes. He told me he has a dream that makes him happy and work hard. That is to be one of the best carpenters in the world. His eyes sparkled when handing over the nest to me. With the nest in my hands, I believe, that his dream will come true one day.

早上出门的时候路过河西小学，热热闹闹的歌声和笑声提醒我，明天是儿童节了呢。时间仿佛一下子回到13年前，似乎能依稀看到自己当年在小伙伴与自己争相开放的花裙和笑颜中一脸的满足。小的时候，儿童节最大的愿望就是穿上新买的裙子，最担心的就是儿童节那天天气骤然变冷。5年级那年的儿童节下雨，为了穿那条白底蓝花的小短裙和配套的短袖白衬衣，我不顾妈妈反对，在冷风中与同样冻得瑟瑟发抖的同伴骄傲地所谓炫耀，结果足足发烧了3天。。。

我在校门口驻足，眼前一幕幕掠过童年的小窃喜和小愚蠢。门口的玻璃门清晰地映照出现在的自己：一脸匆忙，一身尘土。穿裙子的心思早被北风吹跑，常常在酷暑的时候捂着厚厚的牛仔裤，这样在必要的时候才可能毫无顾忌和羁绊地奔跑。。。

纯真总是让人无法抗拒地怀念：不必为谁伤了谁的心而黯然，总是大伙一起快快乐乐地玩耍；不必为明天的归宿而心焦，眼前的动画片和糖果就是一切快乐的源泉；充满想象地做梦，不假思索地大笑，无所顾忌地落泪，所有的鲁莽，喜悦和脆弱都可以不加掩饰，而现在，摘掉面具往往意味着付出代价，成人的世界里有成人的游戏规则。。。

丢掉的糖纸和一直珍藏的小丸子的贴画，麦兜麦唛的卡通书，流氓兔和QQ的手机屏幕，笑起来永远眯眯的眼睛和不齐的牙齿，朋友们总说我看起来长不大似的。有些东西会不可抗拒地流逝，而能够被抓住的也许不仅仅是回忆。我并不介意会被时不时地当作高中生，只是，只是再一次被误认的时候，希望自己能够更不留痕迹地心安理得<:^)